Do you have those days when you feel completely and utterly defeated? Like no matter how hard you try you just can't win? I don't have these days often. I believe we control how we deal with situations. We can make it a lesson learned or we can let it kick us down. But for now, right this minute, I feel completely defeated. It's the first week of February and I feel like this is the worst year I have had since I can remember.
I just can't make people happy. Now not all the time, of course I'm not milkin the sympathy here. It just seems like lately I'm always being corrected, or put in my place. Not that I can't take constructive criticism. But how many times can you get knocked down before you need 12 people to help you back up? Every week something happens. Or several things happen. And I keep taking it and taking it and taking it. But damn. I'm done.
I love being the strong one. I like being the one who cleans up messes, makes sure things get taken care of, being in charge. But when do I get my breakdown? When does the strong person get their day to throw in the towel and collapse? When do you get to say the things you want to say but can't?
Like I said, I know after a good nights sleep I will laugh at how dramatic I'm being. I'm doing hair for some clients of Samantha tomorrow and I know that will perk me up. Doing hair always does. I will go back to the strong woman that I know that I am. I'm working so hard on not taking things so personally and trying not to blow things up but I'm just having a very down day.
No comments:
Post a Comment